Sometimes I have a hard time getting out of bed. Its comfortable and usually I am waking from some pleasant dream that I don't want to end however weird it may be. Like riding a rollercoaster that goes from Los Angeles to my old high school with the cast of You Can't Do That on Television. I mean, that's something that you want to see through to the end. However, most of the dreams I have I can't remember. Only that I don't want them to end. And that's so frustrating, the forgetting. You know that they are going to fade fast and there's not much you can do about that. It slips.
Forgetfulness is an insidious enemy and one of our greatest. It seeps into our lives. We're given a dream, a focus and we set out to pursue it and all of a sudden we're walking a long and we don't know where, what or why. Have you ever gone into the other room to look for something and when you got there you have no idea what you were searching for to begin with? It happens on a grand scale. We need to be reminded. God knows that. He had the Israelites sing songs to remember. They still forgot. It's what communion is all about; remembering.
I have to remember what God has done and more importantly IS doing. Forgetfulness is the death of dreams. Ingratitude is the enemy of inspiration.
Guys, I ain't gonna lie to you. It's getting harder and the doubts are coming fast and furious. The usual self-sabotage seems to be on the brink of taking me out. It's important that you know this. Most of my blogs come after the battle, after I have regained a level of composure and perspective. I am writing right now as one in the thick of battle. Like a war reporter in a fox-hole with bullets flying and bombs booming. I don't intend to give up the fight, yet I admit a fear of ending up a casualty of war and of being hurt again. Guess that's the risk.
Here is what i can rely on:
"...being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion..." -Phil 1:6
I know God started this. And He will finish it for His good will.
These are the good things I can be grateful for:
One of my best friends is making some key decisions in his life to have a relationship with God.
I received word that the writer for "The Cove" (the academy-award winning documentary)wants to meet with me and Todd to talk about our project. That's just ridiculous!
Tonight I went to my first voice-over workshop. What an ego-boost. When someone says to you " I don't know why you're not working in [this field]" that's a good sign. Next step, demo reel.
There are many more, I know, but I'll stop there and just sit and be grateful.
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